Adventure Oasis: finding confidence

Why do I act differently around different people? Why do I only show my true self to my family? Even with most of my closest friends I am on the quiet side. Why was I afraid to get close with people in middle school and high school? Why didn't I have those spiritual conversations I wanted to have (and probably should have had)? Nothing bad happened in my life for me to be like this, I just have always been quite introverted, and that's okay. What's not okay is how I started viewing myself how society views women my sophomore year of high school, self-confidence shaken. Soccer players on my school team whom I looked up to were talking about diet, something I had never though of as a fifteen year old and never needed to. But they were not fat, and so their comments made me wonder about myself. I never was anorexic, but my eating was very disordered: less eating, even more exercise. Looking back, I looked sick physically (I progressively restricted food...it was bad toward the very end of this journey), and I know my mind and heart had been screwed with. I had offered this harsh world a piece of my soul, which led to less self-confidence. I still keep active, but less sports, especially since I am in college. College did help me to eat normally (most of high school I had abnormal fluctuating eating) since the dining hall is all you can eat...self-discipline and dessert are difficult words to pair together. I will no longer deny food or worship it. I need to treat my body well, especially as a woman, with whole foods (not under-eating or overeating) and exercising (not too much, not too little; I personally enjoy running, biking, and swimming!). My body is a temple that does not belong to the world, but to my Creator. And in order to be more confident and strong, I must find my confidence, and ultimately my identity, in Him and Him alone. I choose to change now and start my journey towards pure and true confidence, confidence that is not of this world.